More Love

Sometimes I feel lovesick.  Maybe the short days are part of it - darkness at 4pm.  I should have included a sunset pic today - was tangerine and dark pink - and I missed part of it, distracted by something.  That sunset won't happen again on November 24th 2012.  So many things won't happen again, ever.  Sometimes I want things to stay the same, at least the illusion of calm and stillness - there's comfort in touching my rock collection, remembering where I picked up random stones - knowing I took them from a place under water, or near a mountain path where no one has looked closely at them or picked them up for maybe hundreds or thousands of years, maybe never before.  They are magical, resting where my tiger brooch with emerald eyes and slinking body stalks an unseen prey on the rockpile.

I chose at random, face down,  my animal totem cards today, meditating.  The deck is soothing - it stays the same and selections change.  Today I picked the mountain lion and the fox...and the snake.  This is an active oracle and one I have to be mindful of - but it's all good.  Yes, I've learned to look into things, link pictures, totems, night dreams - I've learned these things to survive, to be ready.  I'm ready for my love to manifest - to happen in this life very soon.  Here's a proem (prose poetry) I wrote in the heat of summer this year.

Halves

To dream of you when night’s dark agents

To their preys do rouse –

To rest – my bedroom fan in swivel half rotation

Turning like a moonflower

To send a puff of stirred air

To me every few seconds

Synchronized as a song.

I wish each soft touch of draft

Would be your caress

In half sleep – the sweet spot

Between this world and the other

You’re with me –

Your perfect nose and sensual mouth

Breathing me gently in, softly

Healing that place of longing

With your kisses

Whispered on a tan line

Of my naked body – the place

Near my lost identity

Removed so surgically and precisely

Years ago with a faint scar

Reminder on the pale unsunned skin.

I ache for your beautiful mouth and lips –

Sometimes I see your curved smile

Or I hear your voice

Accented half god tones –

A sound sending waves

Becoming my body and mind –

Unearthly and more than spoken words

Wonderful and sensitive

Protecting me from all that is unsightly

Keeping me from daggered sentences

Eternally a loving touch

Never telling a lie with your kisses.

This is a marina at Wood's Lake Winfield on Tuesday where I took a pic from inside the restaurant.  I went there with my Mom, Aunt Jean who has dementia and she lives in a seniors care home not too far from there, and her friend Gladys - the octogenarians & me...I do what I can to help while there's time...and we had a nice time. Weather was typical Okanagan overcast Fall day.

Til next time...I search the signs & love nature every day.