After equinox

My sister passed away recently.  Brain cancer is an awful death.  I don't want to talk about it right now.  I would like to remember the good times we had together...and I want to remember the way I kept my strength and inspiration to go to be with her at hospice 152 days in a row.  Her strength was amazing...the way she wouldn't let go of this life.

I looked up 'equinox' in my dictionary because sister left us shortly after that time in a pink mauve sunset.  The word follows 'equine' which pertains to horses.  Equinox is 'equal' and strangely, 'gates'.  I thought of constellations, astrology, language and mythology.  I imagined Apollo, sun god, riding in his horse drawn chariot across the sky to gates of the west. The Tarot card 'The Chariot' is passage, journey. But if you look at the Rider-Waite card closely...the chariot is stationary, like a carved pedestal, like the Sphinx.  What don't we know about chariots of the gods?  What is space and heaven and afterlife, and why don't we concentrate more on exploring these things through lost civilizations?  Maybe there's a way to save our world.

'Lord of the Rings' in paperback I had with me at the hospice.  I rewatched the videos, too - the trilogy.  I remembered how amazing Viggo Mortensen was in these films when I watched the movies again, after first seeing him play Aragorn back in the early years of the 2000 decade.  After this, I went to my local art house type video store, which is the only video store left, thank god.  They stock over 10,000 titles.  I love that that shop.  The mega stores have closed.  I found more Viggo movies, and watched them again.  Love 'A Walk on the Moon'.  His acting is incomparable imo.  He's unique and original.

Anyway, I would love to meet Viggo.  Dare I say, Robert - too many years are going by since the 70's?  I've met and hung with Criss Angel, Michael Godard also...but I'm not a groupie or superfan.  I just love to meet people who inspire.  I aspire to be a good person....and my life and art are one.